What the Hell is Wrong With Us?
My Conceptualization of Society and What is The Possible Solution
*Disclaimer: I am currently a master’s student focused on Clinical Mental Health Counseling and a practicing student therapist. This will be the longest article I have ever written and I ask that your mind stays open. If there are people who disagree with me that is completely fine. Know that if I get feedback that just states an insult, do know you will expect a response from me asking why. I will also assume that you either A. did not read this or B. if you did choose to read this article, I sense it is because you read it selectively.
I will attempt to explain my views as best as I can. Lastly, since people to seem to think unless you are certified, it does not matter. I will be making a thread following the completion of this article and vent myself out.
*Before I continue with my analysis, I want to acknowledge I stand in solidarity with Liv Romano. I encourage my followers to please help free her and spread awareness of the injustice she experienced. If anyone can please donate to Liv’s venmo: @Liv_Romano
Most people see me as friendly, compassionate, competent within my bounds, and reliable. When people see me express my frustrations online most people are quick to judge and go on that automatic assumption that I am toxic. Yes, I have called people garbage and I suppose I could use a better choice of words. However, we are all experiencing an all time low. With the many things that are surrounding us, I want to look at this from a psychological view.
My passion in life is mental health and in a previous article I have expressed my views on why it needs to be reformed. I have a huge passion for human life and how we are supposed to live it. I want to acknowledge two very important things and some will probably question why the hell I am saying it. There is no such thing as being perfect or normal. If you ask me what is normal, I will probably tell you it is how you view what is normal. We as humans have flaws and my mom used to say the only perfect person in this world is dead.
As a society, we must acknowledge that everyone is unique! When I am coming up with a plan to help someone, I try to gain every detail that person has experienced in every dynamic. How we get that information can be a challenge if you are not able to get rapport or not being seen as authentic. In my profession, how I get rapport is not only being who I am and expressing it, but being able to communicate on their level. Some counselors or even psychologists seem to have forgotten the fundamental principle of working with individuals. The number one code in our ethics is that we must respect the person’s identity and welfare.
In other words, respect their choice and what they want. Another code that comes to mind is avoiding harm. In section A.4.b in the ACA code of ethics (2014) is about personal values and it is our responsibility as counselors not to impose our own values and beliefs onto the client. When I look at the ethical codes that I need to abide by, I do not just apply them when I am in the field, I apply them in real-time. These two ethical codes are also a part of my moral code. I am not going to go into depth about what makes a person bad or good just because that can be reserved for another discussion.
My personal belief is that when we come into the world we have a clean start. Once we are in the world the journey begins. I want to be put on record that I do believe that the theory of nature vs. nurture is integrated and I will be happy as well to discuss this in another setting. My theoretical approach to not only counseling but just how I approach people in general is being person-centered. However, I do use different approaches if the situation requires it. I also believe the components of what makes us who we are is how we learn and how we were taught to approach different situations we may experience.
At this point, you are probably wondering what does this have to do with society? Earlier, I mentioned that there was no such thing as normal but merely a perception. This debate of what being normal is, I believe is one of the many components of why society is in crisis. What is considered being “normal” these days, is ignoring and mistreating working class people.
I am aware that most of my audience does not believe in God, but I want to drop an important verse that I personally live by and has helped remind me why I am in this field. I also want to acknowledge that my intention is not to convert anyone and I completely respect other people’s beliefs. I acknowledge that even though we all do not share the same spiritual views, you are still human and I love you. I also want this on the record, if churches are insisting on having influence on our political system they should be taxed and in general I think they should be taxed.
Romans 12:2 states, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” Interpretation of scripture has been a huge debate and now a days people use verses to make it justifiable to conduct garbage behavior. How I interpret this verse is not allowing yourself to get wrapped in societal norms and thinking. By being transformed by the renewal of your mind is having that basic understanding of who you are. Not allowing society to influence your beliefs or change who you are. “Testing your discern what the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect” it is up to you to decide what you think is good. Speaking to my family who does practice Christianity, it is your own understanding and perception of what God thinks is good and acceptable.
The concept of religion in general plays a significant role in society. The 2020 census revealed that 70% of people practice Christianity, 4 in 10 of that 70% are white. More than a quarter of people who are not white identified this is the primary religion they practice. 23% of people are unaffiliated with different branches of religion. I want to acknowledge that I am aware of other religious practices but the dominant religion in the United States that is practiced is Christianity.
I do not express my faith in public anymore. If you want to truly know I am a universalist which emphasizes that we need to be compassionate as people and that the concept of human kind can be salvageable. However, it is worth noting that I do practice the fundamental concept of Christianity which is to see others as your neighbor. When your neighbor is in need you help them and are completely selfless. When there is conflict you approach in good faith with the intent you are trying to gain an understanding.
Because it has been established that it is ok to overlook facts and avoid looking at the overall meaning, we have experienced a shift that has lead most people to forget their own principles and morals. Our spirituality whatever your preference is, is a part of our identity as a human being. At this point you may wonder what does this have to do with why society has become garbage?
What has made society garbage is our desires to have more and that desire ultimately consumes us. Unfortunately, that is what people with power prey on to gain and maintain power over you. From what I have seen, personalities change and the morals we once lived by have been put on the backburner. I want to clarify, the desire to stand by your own principles and wanting to live a reasonable life is completely valid and its intent is good. The desires of wanting to live in wealth and having it easy has created this need to be entitled.
The entitlement I am referring to is expecting that some of us are more important than others. Where do we see this, we see it from the 1% and white middle class wine moms. Once upon a time, I would have argued that we should attempt to talk to these people to have them gain our perspective. Now, this entitlement has gotten so out of control that we our finding ourselves isolating opinions we do not like, blocking opportunities for others to get ahead in life, and in my opinion the reason why so many people act like children and engage in selective reading and listening.
There is this attitude that they believe they are always right and if you try to challenge them or even try to educate, you will get a garbage response and you will be blocked not just online, but also offline. Everytime I experience that, I laugh it off but then I sit and think what motivates a person to be this way. I truly believe 2016 was the year that gave us that permission to be this way. A major factor that plays a significant role, is MSM (mainstream media). They are normalizing this behavior and has been constantly getting reinforced more importantly that is why we must stop the cycle.
What influences MSM is our government. The intended purpose of having media outlets is to provide the audience with correct facts with not asserting your own bias. The intended purpose of the government is to provide for the people they represent. When I am discussing politics, I always try to be civil and gain both perspectives with the intent to either educate or find common ground.
What does MSM and our government do in today’s society? I started describing life as a performative shit show since 2016 and I still continue to live off this principle until I am convinced otherwise. Looking at this from a psychological view, what MSM practices is a concept referred to the Baader-Meinhof phenomenon or the frequency illusion. The role of MSM today is too distract its audience from seeing the imminent demise that we are all going to experience and they do that by presenting a false narrative that follows with providing false hopes.
Even though the concept of the lesser of two evils has been around for as long as I have been alive. As a mental health professional when working with a client in crisis or struggling with addiction, we identify pre-cursors or triggers. Knowing what they are we are able to build a preventative plan. In the case of MSM, elected officials, and at this point whiny millionaires, the trigger was that people were starting to realize that more and more people can see that what they were selling was bullshit. Which left them no choice but to heightened this narrative at an intense level. As much as I despise Trump and I do think he is a vile human being, he was able to express some truths regarding of what has been really happening especially to the working class people.
Admit it or not, Trump knew how to challenge power and was able to get more people to see through this. During the Trump era we were all able to experience this tantrum unfold in real time. Whoever says we live in a free country and it is a dream needs to take a step back and realize that we are living in an Authoritarian country to where only “acceptable” people are able to live their dream. I want to revert back for a brief moment about the concept of human life.
How I see human life is this, life is a gift and we have only one chance to experience it. It is also an experience that you do not face alone, it involves everyone. Human life is priceless and because of garbage outlets and politicians most of us have forgotten that. We have allowed greed and power to consume us which is why people lose sense in their identity. I align with policies such as having healthcare at no cost, free education, and be able to live in a world despite having disagreements being able to practice equality in every setting.
Life never came with an instruction manual and as humans we are curious beings but also we depend on a leader to help guide us with the intent that they have our best interests in mind. We automatically place our trust with people who are in that position to guide us. This whole concept is what is at focus right now and something that needs to be discussed. Right now you may not see why, but I ask please be patient and I will explain.
Because we place our trust with the thought that we would be put first it gives us comfort. What we have been experiencing is a relationship that we are subjected to abuse from every angle (physical, emotional, and sexual) and what follows is manifestations of doubt, denial, and intense self-punshiment. Everyone in this society are currently experiencing trauma that was brought upon by people in power. Trolls that have attacked Tara Reade seem to have forgotten what consequences trauma brings and I want to be sure this will help them understand. In case you also did not know, I want to be able to provide you information of the effects of trauma.
Keep in mind depending on the circumstances of the trauma and that person’s resiliency after effects present themselves uniquely. An initial reaction to trauma signs you should look for and be aware of include, fatigue, confusion, sadness, heightened anxiety, agitation, numbness, disassociation, physical arousal, and a change in affect. Severe trauma (which is what most of us are experiencing) signs to be aware of include, not being able sleep, intense disassociation, and intensive recollections preventing someone to safety. Some people including me bury trauma and are able to function but the effects of trauma appear later.
Thoughts come across your mind and essentially you are trapping yourself to think nothing bad happened to you. I want to acknowledge other thoughts do come but for the purpose of this article and the point I am trying to make is that we are seeing people rationalizing the trauma. There are different types of denial and the ones that I have been seeing are comparing, rationalizing, scapegoating, justifying, grandiosity, and avoiding.
When considering what is in front of me, I would determine what people are experiencing is a severe case of Stockholm syndrome. Though it is not “diagnosable” we cannot ignore it, it exists. Stockholm syndrome is known to be associated with being kidnapped. I would encourage you to look up Patricia Hearst because that case is what essentially brought awareness to this. The key thing that was causing intense effects of the trauma one experiences in this scenario is developing a bond with their accuser. They convince themselves that the accuser did nothing wrong and the accuser was looking out for their best interest.
Pertaining to this trauma what I have seen in terms of the after effects are, confusion, difficulty trusting others, denial, chronic tension, depression, anxiety, learned helplessness, and excessive dependence. I want to acknowledge that some of us have been made aware of what has been going on around us and some of us are stuck. It is because those who are stuck are experiencing betrayal. They are essentially refusing to accept what is going on because they do not want to accept that they have been betrayed by the one system they could trust that provided that safety.
When I see people who are still defending performative talkers I actually feel for them. I understand that pain! However, I approach it as that they are just not ready to accept what has happened to them. I see this pattern with people who have supported Bernie and do not acknowledge that he is working against you. For the record, I will always be grateful for Bernie for many reasons. I am grateful that he opened the discussion on fundamental principles of life and opened the door to a community of people that share my values and mission.
Last night I did a thread about Andrew Yang because I have seen him exhibit to some degree narcisstic and histronic behaviors. I have always been vocal about my deep hatred for hypocrisy and this denial that is occurring around us amazes me but also scares me. The reality is that people are experiencing insecurities in all aspects and we are at a point that society as a whole has accepted this false delusion that things are ok. Because people are so deep in denial and what people have learned from mainstream media people are utilizing two key defense mechanisms, rationalization and projection.
Because the defense mechanisms are being expressed, it has impacting others mentally in a significant way. COVID in itself has been a worldwide traumatic experience which has intensified the after effects from the trauma I mentioned previously. Where do we place the blame then? The first thing we need to acknowledge is, you are not at fault. You are very deserving and entitled to live a healthy life. The blame is on the two party duopoly. As my friend @The_Pale_H0rse stated, “Both sides are guilty of treason and crimes against humanity.” Our fundamental rights are being actively violated and we must take a stand.
So how do we encounter this? We keep showing solidarity and acknowledge that we can have disagreements and still are able to talk things through. We need to demonstrate and model this. We keep demonstrating that what they are doing is not appropriate. In a nutshell we retrain their brain. Now I am not endorsing this will be successful but it is an option that I would be willing to try. Another key is being real and demonstrating what we are saying. For years we always say we are going to do such and such but no action is ever performed. The more times you say what we need to do and not follow through, credibility goes down the drain.
From a psychological stand point, for those who have been made aware of what you experienced, remember your origins. Remember that it does take time to accept what has been happening. Be mindful on how you approach them and meet them at their level. Even if they are not ready to accept it, leave the door open. The last thing you want to do is create more harm to that person and push them away.
Being a part of a movement should not accept someone because they have an “acceptable” personality. By only talking to people you like and isolating ones you do not like just reinforces the practices of MSM. The movement is supposed to be diverse with many voices. Your voice and actions are your most powerful tools, use them. As Rome (@UnholyRom3) said, “You can’t kill the real.” You can’t kill the real because we are resilient and have a network of people we surround ourselves with that helps you become what you are destined to be. Being fake and shady doesn’t get you far and this should be remembered, never forgotten.
One of the best things I have learned, is that there are still people that care and not everyone is heartless. When I rejoined Twitter I was in-between in terms of political beliefs. At that stage in my life I was trying to determine what was real. One day I encountered someone attacking a person that I got the vibe was a real sweet person and very knowledgeable. I went in and defended her. Since then we have become real close and we always support each other when we are in a bad place. My friendship with @fOrGiVeNcHy has truly restored my optimism and hope. Re-introducing myself back into political discourse she has taught me a lot and I still continue to learn from her. Her empathy amazes me and she does try to lift other voices. She is selfless and resilient. To be honest everytime I see people advocating that we need more voices but don’t practice that it really bothers me and it should be a red flag for all of you.
The purpose for my platform is to not only make people aware of issues, but to promote and restore hope. Using your voice can be discouraging at times and it feels like you are yelling at a wall some days. Sometimes it can create that thought of giving up. The reason I post positivity is because it does need to be acknowledged. I am aware that sometimes my positivity posts could be seen as me being selfish. If you know my background and my challenges of trying to get my voice heard then you would understand that updating people who have made an impact, in this case helping you overcome a huge societal mental trauma, it gives you that reminder that hey, I made an impact on this person’s life. The sense of meaning and purpose gets restored.
Just so we are clear and want to put this out there if my platform ever gets big. I am not trying to be recognized just to be recognized. I am not trying to become rich that is not my intention. Even with my substack I do not ask for money. I strongly believe being able to read someone’s views should be free. Gaining insight and wisdom is something we learn and there is not a price on that.
My final piece of insight is to be kind to yourselves and never allow yourself to accept any negativity. Even if we are not successful we can be on record we at least tried. Remembering your roots, listening to other people’s struggles, and your reasons for change is the motivation for success.